The Saga of Dartos Tunic

“The Saga of Dartos Tunic,” by David A. Soskis, Yale Medical School, Class of 1968. “Smile A While,” Journal of the American Medical Association, 9/11/1967. (Clipping found in attic.)

In the land of Genitalia, in another century
Where the branches of the Iliac flow swiftly to the sea
Lived the shepherd Dartos Tunic, handsome, strong, and brave
Who had loved Labia Minora from afar, yet faithfully.

I will have Labia Minora, he cried, though it lead me to my grave
I will win her from Cremaster, that wicked, lecherous, knave.
In his recto-viscial pouch, he packed some humble bread and wine
And set out for Cavernosus, Cremaster’s secret cave.

Within the shadowed vestibule, Labia did recline
Since the reign of Gluteus Maximus there had been none so fine
My path is clear, cried Dartos, and I will never swerve
By the gods atop Mons Pubis, I swear you shall be mine

Cremaster, you wrinkled old bag, come get what you deserve
So shouted Dartos, many times, but no villain did he observe
Deep in Cavernosus that foul fiend Prostate lay
For by drink and dirty living, Cremaster had lost his nerve.

Urethra! Cried young Dartos, as he carried her away
At last I’ve found the woman I love, after searching many a day
They were married the next morning and they lived on happily
Where the branches of the Iliac flow swiftly to the sea


Who says doctors (or doctors-to-be) have no sense of humor? Or that your published items won’t live on for years in someone’s attic?

(I was able to find Medical Student Soskis by a Google search. He is now 76 years old, and practices psychiatry in Bala Cynwyd.)

About Roger Walck

My reasons for writing this blog are spelled out in the posting of 10/1/2012, Montaigne's Essays. They are probably not what you think.
This entry was posted in Popular culture, Writers and Writing. Bookmark the permalink.

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