I have a simple question to ask of lesbian couples, and this is not a disguised sarcastic comment. It is a serious question, and I really want to know.
In many lesbian couples, one of the pair is so masculine, even dressing as a man, with a man’s haircut, and with a man’s swagger, I wonder if the other one can be labeled a lesbian at all. It seems as if the feminine partner has simply found another type of man, one who is more understanding and who won’t get her pregnant. If both were equally feminine, I would agree they are lesbians.
So, my question is: In a masculine–feminine lesbian couple, is only the masculine one lesbian?
Okay, so perhaps this is why we should drop labels altogether, but society does use labels, and I am just an 80-year-old straight guy trying to understand a new culture, I kid you not. Don’t lecture me with hostility; help me out. Several of our high school classmates have since come out as homosexual, and many of those are the most admirable people, then and now.
Perhaps feminine–feminine lesbian couples are far more common, and I only notice the masculine–feminine ones. Is this the explanation?
(From the straight side, men totally understand lesbians. Why would anyone prefer to jump into bed with a rough, smelly, hairy, male body instead of a soft, sweet-smelling, smooth, female body? The choice is obvious to any straight man. It is the straight woman who is the mystery.)